I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Randomize
