My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
