I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
