girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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