just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I can't turn off my feet"
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Can you bring me the toilet please
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
