So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
