By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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