3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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