Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
