you mean i was at the winter classic?
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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