you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
