i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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