remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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