We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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