we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
