Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
