alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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