I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize