Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I want a musical about memes.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
