YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I have already put on my inside pants.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
