The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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