so that wasnt chicken after all
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
