I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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