Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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