I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
