i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
