Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
