he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
This baby is an asshole
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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