Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
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