There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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