i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
