i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
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