how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
