shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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