3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Randomize