just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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