I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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