R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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