Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
