Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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