i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
