I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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