Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
