I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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