He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
