if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
