Three words: puerto rican gang bang
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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