Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize