so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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