Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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